NAA BHAGYAM

Everyone loves the city/Place one has lived in. One has emotions,One has memories connected to it. One has a little part of him connected to that city always even if he lives far away from city. One feels the city he lives in is the best in the world. Indeed it is best city because all the dreams and pleasures he had felt are in that city as he grew up there.


This note that I'm writing is an ode to that city that I grew up in which May/May not be the same again.

                                    

Disclaimer: This article is just a note about this city and the emotional connection I have with. No political sides taken here. :)

         I take a pride in calling myself a Hyderabadi. It is called A City of pearls, A City of Nawabs and of course the city which made Biryani famous and a distinction of being the only city which can make it taste good. To be precise, Mouth watering. :)


        A city that has culture quintessentially conservative yet modern in its own way. Be it the Huge Ganesha's idol that is put in the centre of city every year or The Haleem Season when all most the entire city throngs to these shops to savour the sweetest delicacy you ever get to taste on this earth and important of all the Urdu Mixed accent of Hindi laced with the local Telugu language that the local guys speak and the slang they use, My city is truly unique.


        I had been brought up here. I used to reside in the heart of city near the famous Birla temple. The first memory I have of this city is the famous Ganesha idol I have mentioned before where my dad used to take me before it is about to be immersed with such a grandeur. Every one in the locality used to dance to the rhythmic percussion beat in a different style of dance which I later came to know as “Teen -Maar”. All The festivals have their own way of celebrating style here.
  
       The most innate quality of us is the way we bond with others. We bond with people easily. My Granny always says the one thing she likes about the city is the way they address each other calling Anna(brother) and amount of respect they give each other which she thinks the other big cities like Chennai and Bangalore lack. The city has its own way of loving each other, I agree on that with my Granny.


       All of my life I had been in Hyderabad. I fell in love with her. I realized “How much I missed her I and How much she means to me” only when I had to move out of here. There is no exaggeration here but, my city beautifully treads between the different strata that reside in the city carrying the spirit this city stands for in their hearts.
  
       Now, I see my city change in front of my own eyes. I don't know if the change is for good or bad or necessary. As Someone said,“ Change is the Rhythm of Living” and My city is changing slowly.

      And this change has taken its effect on the Spirit of the city is associated with it. Of late, the spirit has been losing its sheen. Owing to Political scenarios across the state, City has suffered a lot. The spirit the city was broken to an extent. I see an emotion that has indifference to your surroundings and hatred which has crept into the bodies of the same people who carried the city's spirit I mentioned above.


      I don't know what is in store for my city next year. But, I am sure that my city would regain its lost sheen. The spirit of the city might be broken but not dead for sure.

P.S. Khali-peeli angrezi bahut hogaya miyan!! Seedha Hyderabadi mein-ich boltun...

Hyderabad ke sabhi Potte aur Pottiyon ko Naye Saal ka Mubarak!! :)

Please...

It has always been about you
Every time, It's not me but you...

You always had it your way,
And I never had any say...


Still...

Why is it hard to accept me as I am,
When all I ask you is to just feel.
And please don't say 'U give a damn'...
As this is one thing with which you have to deal.


Please don't ask me to bury my past,
So that we can have a future
If I do it I will be just a Miscast
And our relation... A Falling Structure...

HOME-BOUND

        It had been a real long time. I have been too busy. To be frank have been to lazy to take time and write something out here. I have been concentrating on too many stuff to write. Finally, I did decide on what to write.


                                           MY CHEDDI GANG

        Every set of friends thinks they are special and unique and they are the best. We don't. There is nothing special about us. We are just a bunch of friends who studied together, who hang out together once in a while, pull each others legs all the time and yeah forgot to mention this, Ofcourse a bunch of nice looking guys :P.

Disclaimer: Whatever that is written here are purely facts and everything that resembles to actual characters is intentional. :)

        It struck me this week when we all met up as one of us is leaving for his internship to US in Surgery. First in our gang to fly overseas. What a bundle of contradictions is what we are and what a metamorphosis it has been for the past 15 to 16 years. From a bunch of mischievous teenagers to sons who continue to meet their fathers expectations as well as theirs.

        Kaasi, Massa, Guddu,Patty,Bull,Tipple,Appa.... a weird bunch which has been holding together even while everyone of us were busy with our own goals and careers. I wondered,What had been holding us strong for so long. I felt, My gang is a 'Home-Bound' one and will always be, the only common thread between us that had held us so long.

        Schooling was fun.

       The first major funny incident(read intentional accident) and top one would be when one of the nicest chaps in the class was a victim of tipple n his badmaashi. Even now, that chap's mother asks me about him when I visit that guys house. That chap had been subjected to severe treatment on his bum courtesy: TIPPLE. The other major one was when patty introduced himself to us for the first time. We even laugh now thinking how funnily he had pronounced his old school name. The famous Panch Pandavas was the running joke since school days. Or be nonsensical egoistic clash between appa n guddu for something trivial due to which they two didn't speak for almost 7 years.

       10th standard was founding stone where everyone was undergoing a huge character/attitude change towards life. To be frank, after 10th none of us were in touch till we actually got into our graduation. That 2 year period was a major transition in our Individual lives where each one came to know lot about life and other stuff. The most grueling period.

      Why was that distance in spite of being near. I still don't know the answer. I don't even want to know the answer as that period was the time where we just entered the world to stand in our own feet and know what is it to be all by yourself. It came unannounced into our lives telling us there is a whole new world out there where the average guy what we have been in school was in process to find that we are not underdogs but guys who know what they want and know how to get it. Some have got it. Some of them are still in the process. We all will get it.

       Enter graduation, where everyone was in different colleges and pursuing different goals and ambitions. The outlook towards life and to each other had changed to greater extent and most importantly, in-spite of so many changes, the inner most, core element of being 'Home-Bound' hasn't changed.

       Now, whenever we meet I find this element that has been binding us together getting stronger and stronger. Far from the family, in a new world, new environment , we are still discovering the 'REAL' us. We all discuss the conservative mindsets we have been brought up in and how we are in changing those mindsets to our own individual convenience.

       These changing mindsets made us become independent. The one great thing about us is that. We all bought what we always wanted with our own individual efforts. Not even once did we ever ask for a helping hand. Not because we are egoistic but because we know we could get it ourselves and we know we could handle ourselves.

        While Each of one us are still in our paths of goals, fulfilling their responsibilities and nurturing their beliefs about life. One pursuing after something that is so personal and important to him to prove something to someone. The other in the process of finding his real self. One in the process of finding his feet back while the other in the process of fulfilling his family responsibilities.

        As someone said, its a tough world out there, we all are facing the rough patches in our lives without relinquishing the true self and hopefully we come out flying 'Home-Bound'.

P.S: Guddu we all sincerely hope u complete your education before our chidren :) and hope u r having a ball in those formals out there. Will miss ya for sure....

The Coveted

                      Vroom!!! He went… riding his bike at its top speed, aravind started to hate everything in the world. He thought "it’s an unfair world". He had always understood and had been honest about his feelings with sahana, she was caring too. But, when he heard her saying "we have to move on ending our relationship" it came as a shocker. Not even in his wildest dreams did he ever imagine their relationship is going to break. What angered him most was when she termed their relation would not be compatible enough for a long run.


             The speedometer hit 130Km/hr, while all crazy thoughts started to hit him. The sky was turning cloudy as he began to think "Did she find someone else? Was there always someone else in her life? Did she ever throw such a hint? All these murky thoughts came to a halt when he hit the brake at the signal.


*****************


At signal…


             Sitting on the pavement wearing a short yellow frock which suited her slightly fair complexion, she was trying to reach for a rugged doll lying some 7 feet far away from her. As she was reaching for it, her mother saying" baby wait have something and then play with your doll". She shifted her weight and moved slowly towards the torn doll by its only arm. She Oblivious of all the smoke, the noise, the people and her polio stricken legs was happily smiling and living in her own naïve world.


              While waiting for the signal to turn green, aravind was watching all the action silently; envying the girl's happiness and thought "wish I could be happy as her" and sped away.


***************
Few days later…


             Opening the door with a bang and throwing his bag with disgust on the sofa, aravind came inside. Looking at him Ashok asked “what’s wrong?” Replying nothing, aravind just sighed. Without further probing him, ashok returned to his play station. Silently, he came and sat beside ashok and erupted out. “My life is in doldrums… it’s so sick… Nothing is going right. First my girlfriend dumped me, the promotion iam due for is still pending and when I ask my boss he tells me that I am not doing well enough at my office for him to approve my promotion. Just tell me what I can do to make it normal.”


            “Whoa!! Take it easy man” said ashok calmly. “Stop freaking out. Let’s go out and have a shot on the rocks and you will be fine. Go and get ready". They left to their favorite hangout place.


            Later at some bar swaying like a snake, aravind was cursing his boss, his ex and everything in the world for being unfair to him. Already having consumed heavy amount of booze for the night, he grabbed another bottle before setting out with friends on their jeep. Still Bad mouthing his boss and his ex, he sat on the jeep taking control of the steering wheel and he drove across the narrow lanes at dangerous speeds.


***************
Tring…. Tring….


                    It was 9 30 in the morning when the telephone ring made him jump out his bed. His head was spinning. He couldn't remember a thing. Moving towards the jarring telephone ring "Man did I consume the whole bar", he thought and answered it.


Aravind: Hello…
Vishal: Where are you? It already 9:30 Boss was asking for you... Get your ass out here fast…
Aravind: Ok… Fine…man give me half an hour will be there by 10. Something urgent…??
Vishal: No idea dude… just come fast... I will manage meanwhile...
Aravind: Thanks buddy... I owe you one...


            Moving towards the cupboard, he took two aspirins to subside the splitting headache and rushed out to his office.


*************


Aravind: What is the matter? You had called saying that Harisadu was freaking out…
Vishal: I don’t know... he wanted to talk to us both…
Aravind: I hope it is not about my promotion…. Ok let’s enter into the hell.


            Coming out of their boss cabin, they were smiling at each other. Aravind couldn’t believe his luck has changed. “What a turn around!! Till yesterday, I was a sore loser and now…” he thought. He not only had a promotion now but also an opportunity to work from Europe. “Man, for a minute I thought hari sadu was going to fire us for something” said vishal and jumping with excitement interrupting his thoughts.


           Thinking how Europe looks during the winter time, he dialed ashok’s number. “Bro, have a good news. When shall we meet today? Tell others to meet at my place at some convenient time.” “Great, Good for you” said ashok coldly. “We will meet at 7 at your place”.


*************


Aravind: No way… How can I not remember it...? you didn't even tell me about this… you are telling it now…
Ashok: Man we were in a bad state. We had to do it… we had no other option. You don’t even know what happened.
Aravind: even then … It is wrong… we should have…


             Kishore raised from his seat and grabbed aravind by his shirt,said “stop being foolish… we did not do it deliberately… it all just happened in a fraction of second and you were in the driving seat. Don’t forget that”. Pushing kishore back “Forget it… Let us celebrate for the great news that happened at office today” said Ashok “Now cheer up”. Moving away from everyone, “just leave me alone for sometime, I will be fine” aravind said and went out.


************


              Aravind still couldn’t digest what kishore had just said about him being at the driver’s seat when the accident happened. He was looking at the place where he had killed two people the previous night by running over them. The tarpaulin sheet which lay strewn on the ground and a rugged doll were the only remains of the place where the accident took place.


             He took the doll in hands and he could feel he was sweating in spite of the cold weather out there. His hands were shivering not with fear of getting caught for his evil act but of the fact that he realized whom he had killed.


            He collapsed on the ground as only two questions lingered on his mind “What was responsible for that kid’s death and what had changed luck in his favor. He thought. Was it his envy for her happiness or his reckless drunken driving?” Looking at doll, he smiled as he knew the answer.


************

Truly... Deeply... Madly...

Like the Pleasant breeze in the evening….

Like the numbing coldness of the winter…

Like the First raindrop of the season….

Like the Unbearable heat of the summer…

This just a few ways of how they make us feel and they spare none (of course in good way)

Be it the unconditional love they show as a mother or the never ending kiddish fights as a sibling and of course the cloud nine feeling you give us as a special one in our lives. Nothing is parallel compared to the above.

No poem, no story or a few words wouldn't suffice to tell to all women out there in this world that how important are you, how inspiring are you and how gorgeous are you. Just a smile when you see us is enough to create a flutter in our small hearts.

We know we never ever expressed how much you all mean to us. So, this blog goes for all the endearing women in the world. We would continue loving you, respect you and need you at least till 2012 J

It's women's day and that's not the reason I am writing it here. We guys are foolish enough that we rarely actually acknowledge what difference you make in our lives. I on behalf of every guy take the Opportunity to say how much we care for you

All I wish is…

Let your looks make us drool…

Let your beauty enchant us…

Let your love civilize us…

& needless to say… Don't STOP WO(oing)MAN.

LAST DAY

I thought,

It was just another morning,
and would be as usual boring

It came without warning,
To show how I was faring,

All I did in my life,
Was nothing but strife?

Realized that I did nothing,
For whom I was everything

Wrote down all I wanted to say,
Kneeled down to god to pray
　
Because,

It wasn’t just another morning,
It was the day of my mourning.

Baby,You are the One

The weather was cool outside and Anand could sense it sitting at his office. He wanted to go out and feel the pleasant atmosphere and appreciate the surroundings. Working on the final draft of his presentation he said “Aargh!!” thinking about the work that made him stay inside this sullen atmosphere. He finally decided hell with the work and thought “I can complete this later” and stepped outside the office building. He could feel the soft breeze hitting on his face and that instant decided it was perfect for a long drive on the newly bought bike he bought last week.


He rushed to his room changed his attire and drove off to his favorite and uninhabited destination a place nearby to catch the Sun “Set”, one of the few things he loved to watch.


With the cool breeze around, he raced his bike at 100 km per hour and thought “This is life” just for a moment though. Looking back at the vacant place in his pillion, he really wished he had some company now while riding the bike. He wished for that someone who would hug him from his back and urge him ride faster or someone who would hit him on his head now for driving dangerously, that someone with whom he could share the good and bad, that someone who could read his mind now and give him a kiss on his cheek. He did have a few flings in past but they were nothing more than casual affairs. As they say in the books or movies “girl of his dreams” is the one whom he was yearning for right now. He thought, I miss the most essential spice in life “ROMANCE”.


Thinking about these stuff, he reached the place on the top of hill from one can have a perfect view of the sun which would call retire for the day. As he was parking the bike he sensed someone was already there. This made him uncomfortable rather angry. He murmured “Lost another place to this so called civilized world”, thinking now many people would discover his favorite spot, he saw “HER”.


She was on the edge on cliff with her hair let loose and sitting oblivious of the surroundings. He stood there stoned watching her. Her face was so fair and was shining as the sun rays fell on her and the sun’s illuminous light made her hair golden. “She resembled a mermaid” he thought. He could sense something intense happening inside him similar to the sky around that started to colour itself with intense orange and red hues.


He walked casually towards her and just stood there. Looking at him with her grey coloured eyes, she said “sit down” and again went into oblivion. They both just sat there watching the fireball disappear but anand could sense the fire burning somewhere deep inside at his left part of the chest. He didn’t know how to describe it. All he knew was she was the responsible for it she alone can dowse it. As he was busy admiring her, without looking at him she asked “isn’t this beautiful?” “Definitely not beautiful as you as you are”, he wanted to say but managed to squeak “Yea, one of the most beautiful…”

And again they fell silent.


He wanted to ask her many questions like who are you? What is your name? etc, and suddenly his face turned to colour of green pastures that were on hill thinking about what if she is already committed or something like that. He prayed “ man hope she isn’t” and many wild and irrational thoughts came across his mind.

“I am VIDYA”, she said. “Now’s the best part”, he replied pointing at the sky and “I am Anand”. The sun’s brightness was slowly diminishing unlike the feelings now he has for her. With a big smile on her face and extending her hand, “that was lovely” thanks for the company, she said. Looking at her sparkling grey eyes, he said “Anytime” feeling her warm and soft hands.

She: You come often here right?
He: Yea…
She: Alone… Eh?? So sad… (With a grin on her face)
He: Hmm… what to do it is difficult to find one who shares a common taste…
She: Well… Not anymore right?
He: I guess… (Winking at her)

Hitting him on his hand, she said “How rude is that?” . Winking at her He asked, “I wouldn’t be rude if you agree for a cup of coffee now and let ourselves to know about each other a little? What say?”

“Well that would depend on how good the coffee tastes and how good the conversation is?” she said smiling. He felt so relieved and couldn’t believe that she was single and most importantly she was interested.

“There is a shop nearby and I guess we can walk down a little or would you prefer a ride. Anything is fine with me.” He asked her vaguely. “Let’s walk and don’t spoil the nice time we had just now by having a bad coffee” she said. Laughing at what she said, “You are threatening me eh? You wouldn’t be disappointed I can say that”

“Better not”, she said and they started walking down the hill to the coffee shop nearby.


He was in a dilemma how to start and engage her in a conversation. He thought about his feelings for her. He could make out she was smart, friendly and of course superlatively beautiful but, “what made him crazy about her and what made her say yes for a cup of coffee to a stranger like me whom she has met just a few minutes ago” he questioned himself.

She interrupted his thoughts asking him “what made you think that I would say ‘yes’ when you asked me join you for a cup of coffee”. Anand was stunned; “she was actually reading his thoughts” he thought and answered “you know what I was thinking the same”.


Both reached the coffee shop.

Holding the cup with both hands, she said “It smells good”. “Try it, tastes even better” he told. She had that one real fast and asked “Can I have another?” “Sure but first answer did I make your evening pleasant” he quipped.

She said “I would answer it if I have another one” raising one of her brows at him.

Grabbing the second cup, “Hmm…” she quipped, “I guess I made your evening which would have been ordinary if not for me”, And started smiling. The cup he was holding almost fell. He didn’t see that coming. “You read my mind” he blurted.

They started walking back to the place where he parked his bike. He noted that she fell silent. He understood, she knew what he felt about her and thought he has to speak up now.

“Vidya” calling her name for the first time, he said “You are right! You made my evening”. She was silent.
Holding her hand smoothly now, He continued “I no more wish for lonely evenings… and would you share such evenings with me hereafter” She was still silent.

Looking at him she smiled and replied “Sure… but only, if you promise to buy me another cup of coffee for me now…”

One Night Stand

Shankar cringed as she came near him. Placing her hand him, she moved a little closer started to dance. Looking at Ashok, he gave a weak smile as he could feel his scotch filled glass is shaking in his hand.

Noticing this,
Ashok: it happens to everyone when you come to a dance bar for the first time.
Shankar: I guess I need more scotch (the weak smile still on his face)…
What’s her name? (Pointing to girl who just danced near him)

Ashok: Hmm… Interested eh?
Shankar: Nope…. Curiosity sake…. You know her?
Ashok: Yea… they call her kavita

******************

(At some local railway station)

Woman: (at her daughter and son) Move fast inside the train… It has more people… so Zyaada paise milenge

Obeying their mother, the girl and the boy got into train and the woman sat amongst the crowd. While the girl moved a little inside the compartment and placed a big circle shaped ring in front of her. As the little one placed the ring the lady started to play on dhol. A welcome somersault performed by the girl’s brother gained the attention of the crowd and then the girl started to dance using the ring for few minutes. After the act, the sister brother duo approached the audience to find whether their act paid off.

All this while, a gentleman from the crowd was watching this act performed by the family.
As the girl approached this gentleman…
Gentleman: (giving a 10 rupee note) What is your name?
Girl: Pinky (happy that her act was a hit)

The gentleman approached the lady …

Gentleman: Don’t your kids study?
Woman: you know sahib, we don’t have enough money to send them to school
Gentleman: Ok! I will make arrangements to send them to school and you needn’t pay money for it….. if you are ok with it…
Woman: Ok sahib I guess that would be good for them
Gentleman: Ok I will pick the kids tomorrow from the same station in the evening.

***********************

(Next day at the bar)

Shankar: (at the waiter)
I would like to meet the girl in pink dress (Pointing at kavita)

Waiter: Give me a moment sir….

Waiter went to kavita and told her something showing Shankar. She gave him a smile seeing Shankar.

(After some time)

Kavita: So where to go?

Shankar: this is the first time for me… so can we go outside have dinner and come back.

Kavita: Ok… Ok…sure but that would cost you more… fine?

Shankar: yea no problem……

*********************

(Next day at the station)

Gentleman: ok... I have got a car outside... let’s go…
Woman: Ok sahib…
(Hailing a taxi)
Gentleman: Driver The ashram at M.G. Road…
Driver: Ok sir…. (Adjusting the meter)

They drove to the address given by that gentleman

****************

At some restaurant,
Shankar: My name is Shankar….. and I work with…..

Kavita: (intruding in the middle)
I am not interested in where you work as long you have enough cash to pay me for the work I do...

Shankar: ok… No need of being apathetic… was just being friendly…
Kavita: (sardonically) yea right… I am not interested…

Shankar: I can see that… but can’t understand why? You have a problem being friendly..
Kavita: Yea I do… Do you care? For whom should I care? You?

Shankar : (Slowly his temper flaring up) forget being friendly… you are not even polite
Kavita: (calmly) No need to get excited Mr. White Collar… you want your work to get done… so you pay me… just a trade here nothing else... so I don’t see a necessity for being polite or friendly…

Shankar: (offended) what… Blue collared eh… you have something against us, the people who earn their money working hard in a fair way…?

Kavita : Before we start arguing about this would care to place an order for your one night stand here…. I am starving dear (winking at Shankar)

(Shankar places order)

************
(Somewhere in the city)

Pinky was shivering with fear. The gentleman who had promised her mother that he would take them to school has been bought to some big house so far away from the place she knew. She saw many girls of her age there. The gentleman was standing at far end of the room talking to some other people.

After the discussion, the gentleman came near her and said “listen to what they say”. Nodding at what he said pinky innocently asked “where is my mother and when will she come?” He replied “she has been taken care of” and went away.

While she was trying to figure out what he meant, a big man called her name and she went away.

****************

(Sipping the drink she had ordered)
Kavita: You were talking something about fair and unfair?
Shankar: (Sneer look on his face) you tell me we earn money in fair means not… (paused)

Kavita: yea... finish what you were supposed to say… temm one thing Mr. White Collar Don’t we work hard? Since you had brushed this topic… We don’t have the masks that you so called Upper class people have…

Shankar: Huh!!! We…? Every rupee you earn is by flashing that stupid plastic smile of yours to every guy you see… Don’t you?

Kavita: Spot on!!! No denial… But, my dear we work so that we can fend ourselves…

Shankar: Even we work to fend ourselves and our families… but not like you
Kavita: Ok… But we don’t get into these trades voluntarily Mr. White collar and what are you doing to make we people improve our lives

Shankar: Huh!! Aren’t the NGO’s doing their bit by pressurizing the government by legalizing your so called profession and helping you improve your lives.

Kavita: oh yea… Legalizing our profession… It’s a boon but, that isn’t going solve the problems we face…

Shankar: Oh.. what problems do you face… it is we face problems because of you people

Kavita: Please help the poor kids whom the so called gentlemen of your high profile society exploit and push those little ones into flesh trade… and

Shankar: That is where NGO’s are playing the part

Kavita: (On a higher tone) Please save them from those so called NGO’s who in the name of helping the destitute collect the funds and use it for their personal purposes…
Many girls are pushed into this trade promising them of getting them education and not what…
So Mr. White collar… Please don’t give that shit that you people do something good to society…

Shankar: yea… there are people who exploit... but that doesn’t mean no one does good.

Kavita: there is no free lunch in this world… sir… you know that pretty well… and some good happens to conceal the bad that is happening and that’s gonna happen..

Shankar: But, We…

Stopping him….
Kavita: you and me sitting here arguing about this is of no use… as even while we are talking some kid is being exploited over there…
(Winking at shankar) But, you can do yourself a great deal of good if you give me the money you promised to….

(Saying this she grabbed his hand and disappeared into the crowd)